When you live in Tennessee, you don't know have to make stuff up. It just falls in your lap...
MURFREESBORO — A Lebanon woman was charged with felony reckless endangerment and her fourth offense of driving on a suspended license after a witness spotted a 5-year-old boy driving her van on Lokey Avenue at Memorial Boulevard.
Jessica Lynn Fistunenko, 26, later told police she had driven her van to a Memorial Boulevard store Tuesday and left the keys in the ignition while she ran in to get groceries.
A 5-year-old boy and 6-year-old girl were left in the vehicle, according to the report. The report did not indicate if Fistunenko was the children's parent.
Fistunenko told police that when she came out of the store the boy started her van and put it in reverse, according to Murfreesboro Police Officer Michael Payne. The van then traveled to the middle of Memorial Boulevard in the midst of rush hour traffic around 6:20 p.m. No one was injured.
"Fistunenko stated that the boy has behavioral problems," Payne reported.
Behavioral problems? A 5 year old? He's FIVE! All five year olds have behavioral problems. Sounds like its this loony who has the behavioral problem.